March 27, 2009
The Second Half
Back pew view
BY DEACON JIM AND ANN CAVERA
For the past four years I had shared the journey of the 46 Confirmation students filing into the pews in front of me. This had been an especially difficult class, but in the last year or so, things had gotten a little calmer. As a group their behavior often left something to be desired. It wasn’t until I interviewed them individually that I began to get glimpses of the young men and women they might become.
One really bright young man had spent the past couple of years pretending not to be so smart, hoping he could fit in with his peers. A few others with major learning difficulties had often used sarcasm or disruptive humor to hide the fact that they found it difficult to do what was being asked of them. Several guys had more than once pushed limits to appear macho for the benefit of the girls. Some of the girls never answered questions though they knew the answers and often acted as though things didn’t bother them so as not to antagonize the boys. As a group, they had disrupted teachers’ well-prepared lessons and challenged everything including the dress code for Confirmation.
As they processed into church, I watched them, eager to see how this unpredictable group would embrace the Sacrament of Confirmation. As they walked past I saw “Joe” who just a few months ago had thrown some French fries down our hallway and in front of him was “Dave” who left a half-finished bottle of Gatorade in church after Confirmation practice, in spite of our no food or drink rules. Others were so adept at disrupting a group I feared their creativity might make chaos of even the best-planned liturgy. I had deliberately assigned seating so that that certain “trouble makers” were isolated from their comrades. Proudly, silently, they walked by me, dressed appropriately and looking remarkably like young adults. Were they knowledgeable about their faith? Were they prepared? We had all done our best, but only God himself knew the answers to those questions.
Since I was recovering from pneumonia, complete with a hacking cough, this was the first time in many years I didn’t serve at the altar during Confirmation. From my back pew, the next glimpse I had of the faces of these young men and women was immediately after their anointing when they turned from the Bishop and walked back to their pew. In that moment, I caught a glimpse of a transfiguration. Without exception, each had a smile, a look of true joy and a serenity that had often been kept carefully hidden in the months leading to this moment. In the few steps back to their seat, the light of the Holy Spirit remained on their faces.
Regarding the Holy Spirit, Jesus told Nicodemus, “The wind blows where it chooses, and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.” So often we are quick to judge, especially when it comes to young people. We do our best and then shake our heads, giving away our own lack of faith. We forget that none of us has lived up to expectations. Not one of us is the person we might have been. Yet, the Holy Spirit, wild and free still tames hearts and changes lives, no matter what we think.
Deacon Jim and Ann Cavera are former residents of Evansville; their award-winning column is a regular feature of the Message. Contact them at www.catholicseniorspirit.com.