August 28, 2009
The Second Half
New beginnings
BY DEACON JIM AND ANN CAVERA
Three and a half years ago granddaughters Cate and Rachel became part of our everyday lives while our son and daughter-in-law taught during the school year. Last week I went to Cate and Rachel’s kindergarten open house. Standing in the classroom doorway and watching their dad help them find their desks, I had a flashback to another kindergarten open house more than 25 years ago. Back then, I was the parent helping my son find his kindergarten desk and I could never have imagined him as the father of two sets of twins. Where did all that time go?
So, this morning Cate and Rachel began a new chapter in their adventure of life. Instead of bringing the girls to us, their father appeared at our kitchen door with their baby brothers. David and Jamie are now the same age their sisters were when they first began staying with us. We spend our days doing what the rest of the world would think of as nothing. To the boys and me, swinging on the porch swing, taking a couple of walks down the sidewalk to the fire hydrant and playing with Legos and trucks is more than enough to fill a day.
Time with the boys reminds us of the important lessons we tend to forget until we are in the company of children. We so easily forget that where children are concerned, simple things are the most satisfying, and are best when coupled with patience. We climb up and down the front porch steps at least a dozen times because it is always interesting to practice new skills. A yellow fire hydrant must be touched, especially if it has a few ants crawling on it. The piano is a wonderful instrument, capable of all kinds of music; as long as we keep an open mind about what we call music. The three of us “play” the piano together, but we have to stop many times to clap for ourselves while David yells, “We did it!” Grandparents need to rest in the middle of the day. That’s why everybody has to take a nap.
Cate called us at the end of the day to tell us about the bear she had colored brown, orange, yellow and pink. We agreed that those were lovely colors for a bear. She let us know she and her sister will soon be playing soccer and we can come to the games. Relationships need to change or they grow stale. The one thing that doesn’t change is that relationships take time.
Now and then someone asks me if I mind giving up my time to take care of the grandkids. I must admit at the beginning of each semester it does seem a little overwhelming. After a few days in their company, I realize there is no place I would rather be and nothing more important in my life that must be done. Mostly, caring for our grandchildren gives me a little understanding of why God places such a high value on our relationship with him. To those on the outside, time spent in the company of children we love may seem like nothing, and yet it is everything.
Deacon Jim and Ann Cavera are former residents of Evansville; their award-winning column is a regular feature of the Message. Contact them at www.catholicseniorspirit.com.