July 15, 2011
OYAYA
Thoughts after a wedding, the beginning of a marriage
BY STEVE DABROWSKI (Office of Youth and Young Adult Ministry)
“I’ll bet you’re relieved that it’s all over, huh?” In various forms, this question has been posed several times in the last two weeks, and I think it took returning to the office to clarify my answer. Am I “relieved?” No . . . I’m more . . . rejuvenated.
After six months of planning Scripture readings, music selections and even napkin colors, our wedding came and went in the blink of an eye. No, it didn’t seem like that in March, and by mid-May, I was known to mutter to myself about fees for things I didn’t even know could be rented. Still, by 11 p.m. on June 25, it was over. I have these flashes of someone giving us a congratulatory embrace or dancing with my “nieces” at the reception, but all those months of stress and planning just faded into the vapor of memory sometime on Saturday evening.
Our recent wedding and reception were only intended to be the beginning — not the end. They were supposed to end in “the blink of an eye” so that we could get down to what is really important in marriage — vocation, God’s call to love and serve him by willing the good of our spouse. How we got there is far less important than the fact that we did get there. If the wedding had been a logistical nightmare, or the reception hall had burned down before the event, we’d be just as married — the Sacrament would have still been efficacious.
Similarly, this summer is a continuous whirlwind of planning. Plane tickets, amusements and food concessions are being negotiated for the Diocesan Youth Rally in September. Four buses will take youth to the National Catholic Youth Conference in November, and seven more are reserved for the Pilgrimage for Life in January. Speakers have been booked for several events, including the Confirmation Spectacular at the end of January, and musicians are preparing the accompaniment for the St. Maria Goretti Youth Distinction in March. Yes, some days still find me muttering to myself like I was back in May!
Yet all the current planning to prepare for the next school year will, hopefully, just drift away into vapor. The events themselves aren’t what is important; what they accomplish is what matters. Did young people encounter Jesus Christ as a result of the Diocesan Youth Rally, NCYC, and the Pilgrimage for Life? If not, then these events were a waste of time and energy. But if the reality of a relationship with Jesus Christ remains, as the occasions themselves fade into memory, then all the effort and planning will have been worthwhile.
In the end, I’m not so much “relieved” that our wedding is over. I’m more revitalized — ready to live the call God has given me and my wife to share. That’s the meaning of vocation. And that’s what all the planning this summer should accomplish for youth of the diocese, too — hearing God’s call. That result will leave me quite relieved . . . and grateful.
(By the way, honey, you were right about the white napkins.)